Pity Party

Thursday, March 3, 2011

What has it been now, like 3 weeks since I've written? Ha whoa... slacker!
Boo me.
3 weeks... it's crazy how much can happen in as little time as that. I usually know exactly what I'm gonna blog about from the start of my day. And I'm usually really really excited to blog. But the last 3 weeks have been rough for me. Real rough. I couldn't seem to find motivation to blog... or even to talk to anyone much at all. Nothing really seemed worth the effort. But I can definitely say I've learned lots of things in these past 3 weeks... specifically in the past couple of days. Not all of them being life changing or total revelations. But I feel like they are definitely worth sharing.

Monday I learned that I get headaches from garlic bread. Super insignificant piece of information... but just a fair warning to you all who get headaches. Check your garlic.

Tuesday I learned that I can't believe everything people say about me. I've had a rough time with that in the past and I'm super proud of myself to be able to say that I'm over that, and I can say that for the most part I am the person I wanna be. But at lunch I was told some real hurtful things. If I was told those things last year I'd be a wreck. And for a few hours, that's exactly what I was. A complete wreck. Then the light bulb went on, and I thought "Hmm.. why should I even care? There's no reason to let these things get me down. Suck it up Aly.. look at yourself and be pleased just like you were before." And that's exactly what I did. I put on my skinny jeans, went to Arby's and ordered a large fry and Dr. Pepper.

 How am I supposed to sum up what I learned on Wednesday? Well, first off I learned who talks to me because they like me and who talks to me because my dad's an assistant coach at BYU. It's obvious when someone says, "Hey Aly! Wow you're so pretty, let's hang out soon! I like your shoes, do you have extra tickets?" Haaaa. Not the most sly move in the book. I also was reminded how bad losing sucks, and how bad crying in front of people sucks. And at the end of that night, I layed in bed and was reminded how good Dr. Pepper is when you're crying yourself to sleep.

And now for today....
I had a big eye opening experience today. After 2 class periods of getting crap from people who claim to be BYU fans (a fan does NOT give up on a team after a loss), I went home for the day and I watched The Bachelor while eating my weight in toast. Pity party, pity party. But tonight I realized two things (thanks to Stephanie Nielson)... and without realizing these two things I guarantee you I'd still be in the bottom of my bed pity partying.

First off, basketball isn't my life. Let me correct that- basketball SHOULDN'T be my life. Life's too short to worry about the Final Four and the MWC Tournament. Yeah yeah, that stuff is super fun. But really, a year from now is it gonna matter whether we took the win over UNM or not? No. This is all much easier said than done... slowly but surely I will come to the complete realization that basketball is NOT my life... that there are more things to dwell on than that 50 foot shot that Jimmer sunk.

Secondly, and what I feel is most important, you either live in hope or despair. Simple as that. Hope or despair. They are polar opposites, but somehow there is no middle ground, no gray area between the black and the white. You either live through your rough days with hope that tomorrow will be better, or you pull through them wishing it would just end already. There's not a state of mind that allows you to do both, there just isn't.

All in all, this week has been a complete rollercoaster ride. Dang, I really hate that saying.. It's so overused but it explains things so much. Life really is a rollercoaster. You have your ups, and you have your downs. But why would you throw yourself a pity party on a fun rollercoaster? No one will attend, and your ride will be awful.
Hop on the rollercoaster...
And make sure that picture at the end is beautiful.